Big News!

So I have recently acquired a wonderful piece of news my dear friends! Drum roll please..... I am pregnant! Yes that's right I have a little alien inside of me growing and I could not be more excited! Me and Jade can't wait for our little person to come into this world. Being six weeks pregnant I didn't think I would be as sock as I have been but such is life and I feel so blessed to be on this new path and journey
With Love From a New Perspective
XOXO Kaitlin

The Life of a Gypsy

So lately the universe has been testing my management skills. Moving out to the middle of nowhere becomes difficult when you are accustomed to life in a city, and moving around with your belongings and life scattering behind you is anything but easy. In a way it is enlightening, we are so worried about our possessions and our materials that when you detach you feel freer. Sometimes it is hard. Sometimes I beg the universe to just give us a place to put all our stuff in an organized manner with cute wall decorations. Soon, it will be soon but not right now, it is teaching me patience and love and understanding. I am getting the hang of the gypsy thing and I kind of like it I have never been much of a home body anyway. To be completely honest the only way I will get the hang of it completely is if I accept it completely and I am beginning to do that. Jade is helping me accept it faster. I see how easy it is for him and all the adversities he faces trying to make a life for me him and the dogs and it gives me inspiration to see him work so hard even trough all the challenges life puts in front of him. I couldn't be happier, even when things get tough and I want to throw my hands in the air  and throw in the white flag I don't because this is the life I chose the one I want. I don't expect it to be easy and I don't expect it to get easy anytime soon. Life comes with adversity and I am prepared to face it.

With Love From A New Perspective
XOXO Kait :)

Where This All Will Go

My life has certainly changed in two years. I am no longer in high school, I graduated and took a year off to work (Big mistake) and also experimented with love. I had a few falling outs over the last two years but I think I found something wonderful with Jade, my boyfriend.

In fact, I am getting ready to start my journey with him, where the path will lead I am not sure but I am willing to take the chance and walk down it because I know he is worth it. I guess you could call it modern day pioneering if there ever was such a thing. Moving out, off grid, into the most beautiful Forrest you have ever seen away from people and just making it work out there. Surprisingly, I am not scared. In fact  I am ecstatic!   It already feels like home to me there, more so than here with my parents in my shared room with my sister always feeling in the way.

So I suppose this blog will be written from a new perspective, the perspective of a twenty something with nothing and everything to lose trying to navigate her way through life, love, and the wilderness.

With Love from a New Perspective
XOXO Kait

Coming back

I always seem to turn back to old comforts when I don't, or can't, deal with emotions. In all honesty I am a very sensitive person. Not only am I constantly dealing with my own bombardment of emotions I am absorbing everyone else's simultaneously. No one understands this. I seem to always find myself lost, like a tiny fish in a massive ocean of feelings and energies. I have learned to deal with it, adapt to it, but lately I can't seem to get a grip on all of it. So I am back and maybe its for the best. Two years is to long anyway.
With love from a New Perspective
XOXO Kait

Musings at midnight by an insomniac

The time is not a problem in my world, time is simply a thing for keeping to put up in a little box and forget it ever existed. In my world sleep doesn't exist and ideas dominate the entirety of the place. It shifts from summer to winter with subtle brush strokes of a passing thought and smile. Slipping in and out of a haze that is filled with too real dreams and nightmares, or maybe they are all beautiful nightmares waiting to be seen. Give me your hand and I'll walk you through my dreamland, through this beautiful nightmare.

My Music Inspired Coma and Other Musings That I Feel Are Important to Write About

Today I pay tribute to Pandora and the genome project. I've been going through what I can only call an emotional cleansing the last few days and basically I've been cleaning out the skeletons in my closet. It's been an eye opening and heart lightening past couple of days. So with all this emotional draining I'm starting  to feel a little lethargic and im feeling the need to find a hole to crawl into and just melt away into a little happy puddle :). Even as I write this I'm comfortably happy. So why is it, you ask, that I pay a tribute to Pandora? Because my music is my escape to myself, and pandora just happens to be my go to place for my music. Just while writing this, four of my favorite songs have played. I can't express how grateful I am to have pandora and music in general. For whatever situation I face, or whatever emotion I am processing, there is a song for it. Song of the momment: When You Were Young by the Killers. With everything that I am getting rid of, I'm filling that empty space with music and I'm letting the chords and lyrics take hold and fill me up with happy. If there was ever a time to clean out from under my emotional bed it's now. With my senior year coming up I'm ready to go and I'll have enough to pack up, minus all the emotional baggage. So to pay my daily respects for my favorite band, Panic! at the Disco, here will be my senior year theme song that I'm sure will continue to inspire and motivate me to move on and get the hell outa Dodge ;)
With Love From A New Perspective,
-Kait :)
"Ready To Go (Get Me Out Of My Mind)"

(Oh oh oh oh oh
Oh oh oh oh oh)

You've got these little things
That you've been running from
You either love them or I guess you don't
You're such a pretty thing
To be running from anyone
A vision with nowhere to go

[PRE-CHORUS:]
So tell me right now
You think you're ready for it
I wanna know
Why you got me going
So let's go
We'll take it out of here
I think I'm ready to leap
I'm ready to live

[CHORUS:]
I'm ready to go
(Get me out of my mind
Get me out of my mind)
I'm ready to go
(Oh oh oh oh oh
Oh oh oh oh oh)

You've got these little things
You wanted somethin' for 'em
You either get it or I guess you won't
What does it really mean
To get nothin' from anyone?
There's a million ways it could go

[PRE-CHORUS]

[CHORUS]

I think I'm ready I think
I know I'm ready I know
I think I'm ready I think
I know I'm ready I know
I think I'm ready I think
I know I'm ready I know
I think I'm ready I think
I know

[CHORUS 3X]

That Weird Moment When You Realize Something and Then You Hear A Song About It

So this last week I have done some evaluating and I have made some changes to my life. First and foremost I had to admit to myself that I couldnt finish one of my classes and there was no way I could finish it, so I had to put my big girl pants on and take a withdrawl in the class. I always hate feeling like a quitter, but I was feeling so stressed out, and dropping that class lowered my stress level  a LOT. Second, I had to admit to myself that I had been sugar coating my relationship with my boyfriend. It was like dipping rat poison in honey, just because it tasted sweet didn't mean that it wasn't going to kill me. So I ended it.

After this metaphorical cleaning house, I feel great. I feel happy and awake again. Sure, I'll feel even better once I finish the rest of my classes and I deal with all the other little loose ends that need to be tied but for right now I will bask in the pool of happiness that I feel right now. As for American HI-FI thank you for making this song, it was the perfect theme song for my last relationship :)
With Love From A New Perspective
-Kait :)
"Flavor Of The Weak"

she paints her nails and she don't know
he's got her best friend on the phone
she'll wash her hair
his dirty clothes are all he gives to her
and he's got posters on the wall
of all the girls he wished she was
and he means everything to her

[chorus:]
her boyfriend, he don't know
anything about her
he's too stoned, Nintendo
i wish that i could make her see
she's just the flavor of the weak

it's friday night and she's all alone
he's a million a miles away
she's dressed to kill
the tv's on
he's connected to the sound
and he's got pictures on the wall
of all the girls he's loved before
and she knows all his favorite songs

her boyfriend, he don't know
anything about her
he's too stoned, he's too stoned
he's too stoned, he's too stoned

yeah she's the flavor of the weak
she makes me weak